The One

Have you ever found The One?
Yea
Me, too.
Only thing is...

They didn't find me.

Anxious

It starts out like anything else

easy, approachable

it's not until you get there you realize:
nothing about this is easy.

how are you supposed to do this on your own

everyone expects you to do this, and
do it well, with ease

your heart pounds

your head swims

your lungs are tight as you try
to not gasp for air

the first tear falls, and you hastily
brush it away

before anyone can see that you
are not okay

if you ask for help, they'll see
you're struggling

they'll offer pity you don't want,
solutions you can't use

you'll smile politely and thank them

even though they've only made it
harder for you

you inhale deeply, ignoring the pounding
in your chest

this is your last chance to turn away

you almost do

then you remember

this is your dream

you build yourself up, use your friends
for support

you turn back to face it, and
it's not so scary anymore

even if your heart still pounds

your head still swims

your lungs are still tight as you try
to not gasp for air

the support of your friends feels
weak

but you know it's strong

tears fall like rain

and even though your friends
are there to support you

no one is there to help
wipe away the tears

you have their support but
you're always alone

Broken

I love you.
I know. I'm sorry.
You don't love me, do you...
I'm sorry.
Did you ever love me?
I'm sorry.
But...

Then why? Why did you stay with me?
Hope.

I guess I just hoped I'd wake up one day as madly in love with you as you are with me.
Oh.


Do you think we'll ever get back together?
I don't want to give you that hope.

So I guess...you don't want to be with me anymore, huh?
...I'm so sorry...



It's fine.












It's fine...

Transition Poems 01

01

pure, white
unspoiled
perfect

warm, orange
new
exciting

together, no fear
friends
happiness

drifting, moving forward
progressing
forever

alone, white
colorless
apart

----------------------

02

apart from the world
it's all new, clean
is there a purpose?

near to the world
things are changing
color soils the world

color is the world
bring me color
and color my world

gone from the world
color has spoiled it all
now i miss it

-----------------------

03

nothing
this world is
empty
but pure and clean
untouched

purity fades
color
takes over
change
takes over

friendship
a dare
always so close

forever
forever

never really
apart

---------------------

04

set apart
drifting

a part
of me

a part
of you

always
together

apart but
always
a part

-------------------

05

a world so unaware
peaceful
and calm save the
ringing in my ears
to move on

-------------------

06

wandering aimless
in a world of white
unaware

a change
warm light, sound
something new

companion
warm and bright
forgot loneliness

adventures
drifting, exploring
a part of something

remember
a world of white
apart

Without Blue

Version 1

Without Blue

Without the silence of solitude
things are beginning to change

Without the distance between us
there is color in my world

Without loneliness
everything feels right

Without you
I feel I'm losing color

Without Blue

Snow In Spring

Version 1

Snow in Spring

Flowers blossomed
Warm and bright
Orange

The warmth melted
The snow
From the ground

It was a beautiful
Spring
Neverending

The orange flowers
Faded
Spring grew cold

Snow in Spring

Blue

Version 1

Blue

Without black, there is no white
Without light, there is no dark
Without evil, there is no good
Without friends, there are no enemies
Without cold, there is no warm
Without blue, there is no orange
Without you, there is no me

I never knew what blue was until you
brought the warmth of orange to my life

now that you're gone
the orange warmth is gone

I'm left cold

Blue

Distant

Version 1

distant

starting so far apart
we closed the gap, working together

together we were good
we had fun and we succeeded

i could feel the distance grow sometimes
but it always seemed to shrink again

you should be here now
but the distance has grown too much
and you're so far

distant

Breaking The Ice

Version 1

Breaking The Ice

how much does a polar bear weigh?
you laughed, and that was good enough for me.

how much does a polar bear weigh?
you stayed with me, that was better than before.

how much does a polar bear weigh?
stay with me through my ridiculous behavior

how much does a polar bear weight?
not enough to keep you

breaking the ice

Cold Feet

Version 1

cold feet

it never would have happened
without someone to help me along

never before did i realize
how much someone could mean to me

then someone mattered
and i couldn't imagine life without

but i got scared
it's my fault
i ran away

cold feet

Never Alone

Version 1

Never Alone

Content.
Content to be alone.
Never realized that I was lonely.

Light.
Color.
It was all so new and beautiful.
I would never be lonely.

Content.
Content to stay like this.
Loneliness wouldn't dare to touch us.

Dull
Lost
I never thought this would happen
You'll still be with me in my heart.

Never Alone.

Emptiness

Version 1

Emptiness

The void was filled
Nothing would ever
Destroy the happiness

Everything was perfect
Laughter and smiles
The world was full of color

Delicate and pure
Didn't last forever
Color changed the world

Cold and empty
The color was gone
What is left

Emptiness

Without

Version 1

Without

There you were
So happy-go-lucky

When we finally met
I knew I would never want to let go

The light was brought to my life
I have never known it was missing

Perhaps I took it for granted
I miss it now

Without

Apart

Version 1

Apart
 

And there you were.

You found me and I found you.
We need each other.

I enjoy your company
And I think you enjoy mine, too.


We can be friends forever.
Can't we?

Will you miss me?

Apart

Version 2

set apart
drifting

a part
of me

a part
of you

always
together

apart but
always
a part

True Blue

Version 1

True Blue

It was like winter
White and pure
Untouched

Suddenly there was warmth
And everything came to
Life

I never would have known
That the white
Was blue

Without having the warm
Orange
You brought to my life

The opposite is all
That is left
Now that you've gone

And I am left with
 True Blue

Blue Springtime

Version 1

Blue Springtime

Blue was never so bad
On my own
You changed my world
With Orange warmth
It was as if the Blue never existed
I hope this Orange warmth
never goes away

I guess I didn't realize
When you started to slip away
And all the Orange warmth
Went with you
Now it's just

Blue Springtime

Blue in Springtime

Version 1

Blue in Springtime

Alone, the blue wasn't so bad.
I hardly even noticed.

When I met you
Everything started to change.
You brought warmth and happiness.

I realized how dull life had been
Without you
I never want to go back.

The warmth is slipping away
I don't want to go back.

Alone
The warmth is gone now

All I have is
Blue in Springtime

Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time,
I loved you like I
Should. Then you
Changed and
Everything
Changed with you.
The Changes were
scary and unwelcome,
Unwanted.

What I wanted was for
Everything
to Change.
Change back to how it
used to be,
When you loved me.
When you really,
truly
Loved me.

Did you ever really love me?

Was it all just some joke?

Now you're gone and it's
All over.

And Once Upon A Time
is long, long gone.