She could feel it as she stood there, eyes closed. Someone - or maybe it was something - was reaching out to her. Reaching for her.
Her heart started to beat a little bit harder in her chest. Another second and it was going to reach her, it would have her. She didn't know what would happen then. Breath catching in her throat, fear clamping around her heart, her eyes flew open. She wasn't sure what she had been expecting to see in front of her, but there was nothing there. The room was empty. Silent. Save for the sound of her own breathing.
Whatever had been there was gone now. Or maybe she just couldn't see it lurking in the shadows, waiting for its chance. Wait for her to close her eyes.
Next time.
Monday, July 01, 2019
Saturday, January 27, 2018
After All This Time
Because my friends are huge Bellarke shippers, and I love my friends <3
somewhere in season 5...
--
Chest heaving with labored breathing, Clarke's blue eyes scanned the scene around her. There were bodies everywhere. She swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. This wasn't what she'd wanted. This wasn't what any of them had wanted.
The blood drying on her face was itchy, pulling at the skin in that perfectly irritating way. When she lifted her hand to wipe it away, it was still sticky to the touch. Her stomach churned at the feeling, a soft groan slipping from her lips as she let her gaze drop to the ground. Blood from the bodies around her was pooling at her feet. Her head snapped up as her eyes looked around, her expression frantic. "Madi," she shouted, worried her companion had been lost in all of this."Madi!" This time the name tore from her lips more desperately. Clarke began to move, tripping on lifeless limbs as she hurried to move away from the slaughter.
A familiar sting prickled behind her eyes, and she willed herself not to cry. Not now. She had to be strong, just like always. Steeling herself against her own selfish emotions, she clenched her jaw and kept moving, wading through the bodies. At the edge of the battlefield, her foot caught, tangled in the limbs of one of the fallen. Clarke was afraid to look down. Just as she began to turn her head, someone grabbed her hand.
"Don't." The voice was all too familiar. That rough, confident sound had filled her dreams, her nightmares, for 2,199 days before she'd heard it again. She had thought she'd been dreaming, but it was really him; it was really Bellamy.
Clarke looked up at him as he helped her out of the sea of bodies. For what it was worth, she was glad he was here - she didn't want to do this alone. His face was covered in blood, as she imagined hers was, too. "Have you seen Madi," she asked, not able to keep the worry from creeping into her voice. That same concern was tightening in her chest, gripping at her heart.Until finally...Bellamy nodded, "she's safe." An audible breath of relief poured from Clarke's lips, shaky at best.
"Oh, thank god," she muttered, her whole body finally relaxing. Pulling her eyes back to his face, she looked at him, silence stretching between them. The lump was growing in her throat, and she knew it was only a matter of time before her tears fell whether she wanted them to or not. When Bellamy turned, his eyes meeting hers, she could see the same on his face, the tears behind his eyes he was trying so hard to will away. Heart hammering in her chest, she realized she was still holding his hand, clinging desperately to the warmth that seemed to radiate from him. Blinking, she looked down at their hands, focusing on what was important right then and there.
"Did Octavia-?" As she asked, she looked back at him. Her question was cut off by his response, a shake of the head. Her stomach lurched; she felt sick. Clarke squeezed his hand gently as she pulled him into her, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, fingers tangling in his blood-matted curls. It took a moment, or maybe two, but soon enough, she could feel his arms wrapping around her waist.
When Bellamy pulled away, Clarke's cheek brushed against his. It was such a soft touch, it was almost enough to make her forget they were standing at the end of the world. Again. Looking at him, Clarke could see that he'd let the tears out. She wiped one away with the pad of her thumb, but she only smeared more blood over his freckles. A small wrinkle formed between her brows as she looked at him, wishing she could make things better. "Bellamy, I-" She didn't know what to say, though, and as she cut herself off, they both leaned in.
It had been ages since she'd kissed anyone like this. This felt right, natural. And yet...
Clarke pulled away, her eyes searching Bellamy's face as she took a small step away from him. A smile tugged the corner of her lips upwards, and she found she couldn't stop it. The smile spread over her face, and she glanced away, feeling suddenly shy about it. When she looked back at him, though, he was smiling, too.
It didn't seem to matter that they were both disgusting - sweaty, covered in blood and dirt and grime - because they had finally found one another. It had taken them over six years, but here they were. The tears started sliding down her cheeks, trailing through the blood and mud. For the first time in a long time, Clarke let herself be selfish, and she hoped Bellamy wouldn't mind: She kissed him again. This time, it was on purpose, this time it was fueled by desire rather than their shared pain. The warmth in her chest, spreading, made her wonder just how long she'd loved him and never realized it.
somewhere in season 5...
--
Chest heaving with labored breathing, Clarke's blue eyes scanned the scene around her. There were bodies everywhere. She swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. This wasn't what she'd wanted. This wasn't what any of them had wanted.
The blood drying on her face was itchy, pulling at the skin in that perfectly irritating way. When she lifted her hand to wipe it away, it was still sticky to the touch. Her stomach churned at the feeling, a soft groan slipping from her lips as she let her gaze drop to the ground. Blood from the bodies around her was pooling at her feet. Her head snapped up as her eyes looked around, her expression frantic. "Madi," she shouted, worried her companion had been lost in all of this."Madi!" This time the name tore from her lips more desperately. Clarke began to move, tripping on lifeless limbs as she hurried to move away from the slaughter.
A familiar sting prickled behind her eyes, and she willed herself not to cry. Not now. She had to be strong, just like always. Steeling herself against her own selfish emotions, she clenched her jaw and kept moving, wading through the bodies. At the edge of the battlefield, her foot caught, tangled in the limbs of one of the fallen. Clarke was afraid to look down. Just as she began to turn her head, someone grabbed her hand.
"Don't." The voice was all too familiar. That rough, confident sound had filled her dreams, her nightmares, for 2,199 days before she'd heard it again. She had thought she'd been dreaming, but it was really him; it was really Bellamy.
Clarke looked up at him as he helped her out of the sea of bodies. For what it was worth, she was glad he was here - she didn't want to do this alone. His face was covered in blood, as she imagined hers was, too. "Have you seen Madi," she asked, not able to keep the worry from creeping into her voice. That same concern was tightening in her chest, gripping at her heart.Until finally...Bellamy nodded, "she's safe." An audible breath of relief poured from Clarke's lips, shaky at best.
"Oh, thank god," she muttered, her whole body finally relaxing. Pulling her eyes back to his face, she looked at him, silence stretching between them. The lump was growing in her throat, and she knew it was only a matter of time before her tears fell whether she wanted them to or not. When Bellamy turned, his eyes meeting hers, she could see the same on his face, the tears behind his eyes he was trying so hard to will away. Heart hammering in her chest, she realized she was still holding his hand, clinging desperately to the warmth that seemed to radiate from him. Blinking, she looked down at their hands, focusing on what was important right then and there.
"Did Octavia-?" As she asked, she looked back at him. Her question was cut off by his response, a shake of the head. Her stomach lurched; she felt sick. Clarke squeezed his hand gently as she pulled him into her, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, fingers tangling in his blood-matted curls. It took a moment, or maybe two, but soon enough, she could feel his arms wrapping around her waist.
When Bellamy pulled away, Clarke's cheek brushed against his. It was such a soft touch, it was almost enough to make her forget they were standing at the end of the world. Again. Looking at him, Clarke could see that he'd let the tears out. She wiped one away with the pad of her thumb, but she only smeared more blood over his freckles. A small wrinkle formed between her brows as she looked at him, wishing she could make things better. "Bellamy, I-" She didn't know what to say, though, and as she cut herself off, they both leaned in.
It had been ages since she'd kissed anyone like this. This felt right, natural. And yet...
Clarke pulled away, her eyes searching Bellamy's face as she took a small step away from him. A smile tugged the corner of her lips upwards, and she found she couldn't stop it. The smile spread over her face, and she glanced away, feeling suddenly shy about it. When she looked back at him, though, he was smiling, too.
It didn't seem to matter that they were both disgusting - sweaty, covered in blood and dirt and grime - because they had finally found one another. It had taken them over six years, but here they were. The tears started sliding down her cheeks, trailing through the blood and mud. For the first time in a long time, Clarke let herself be selfish, and she hoped Bellamy wouldn't mind: She kissed him again. This time, it was on purpose, this time it was fueled by desire rather than their shared pain. The warmth in her chest, spreading, made her wonder just how long she'd loved him and never realized it.
Thursday, March 23, 2017
Anxious
It starts out like anything else
easy, approachable
it's not until you get there you realize:
nothing about this is easy.
how are you supposed to do this on your own
everyone expects you to do this, and
do it well, with ease
your heart pounds
your head swims
your lungs are tight as you try
to not gasp for air
the first tear falls, and you hastily
brush it away
before anyone can see that you
are not okay
if you ask for help, they'll see
you're struggling
they'll offer pity you don't want,
solutions you can't use
you'll smile politely and thank them
even though they've only made it
harder for you
you inhale deeply, ignoring the pounding
in your chest
this is your last chance to turn away
you almost do
then you remember
this is your dream
you build yourself up, use your friends
for support
you turn back to face it, and
it's not so scary anymore
even if your heart still pounds
your head still swims
your lungs are still tight as you try
to not gasp for air
the support of your friends feels
weak
but you know it's strong
tears fall like rain
and even though your friends
are there to support you
no one is there to help
wipe away the tears
you have their support but
you're always alone
easy, approachable
it's not until you get there you realize:
nothing about this is easy.
how are you supposed to do this on your own
everyone expects you to do this, and
do it well, with ease
your heart pounds
your head swims
your lungs are tight as you try
to not gasp for air
the first tear falls, and you hastily
brush it away
before anyone can see that you
are not okay
if you ask for help, they'll see
you're struggling
they'll offer pity you don't want,
solutions you can't use
you'll smile politely and thank them
even though they've only made it
harder for you
you inhale deeply, ignoring the pounding
in your chest
this is your last chance to turn away
you almost do
then you remember
this is your dream
you build yourself up, use your friends
for support
you turn back to face it, and
it's not so scary anymore
even if your heart still pounds
your head still swims
your lungs are still tight as you try
to not gasp for air
the support of your friends feels
weak
but you know it's strong
tears fall like rain
and even though your friends
are there to support you
no one is there to help
wipe away the tears
you have their support but
you're always alone
Character Study - Gina Martin, The 100
**the following contains spoilers for season 3 of The 100**
A smile passed over Gina's lips as she thought about Bellamy. Shaking her head, she tried to free herself of the thoughts; she had more important things to do right now, like find those launch codes. But there was nothing helpful anywhere easily found. Guess today wasn't exactly their lucky day. There had to be a silver lining, though, didn't there? They weren't about to drop a missile on a Grounder city, for one.
A smile passed over Gina's lips as she thought about Bellamy. Shaking her head, she tried to free herself of the thoughts; she had more important things to do right now, like find those launch codes. But there was nothing helpful anywhere easily found. Guess today wasn't exactly their lucky day. There had to be a silver lining, though, didn't there? They weren't about to drop a missile on a Grounder city, for one.
"Gina to Raven, come in."
"I got nothing, no launch codes. Guess our luck is still holding."
Keep looking. It should have been easy, shouldn't have been a problem. As she leaned forward over the president's desk, over all the papers she's scattered there, a hand clamped over her mouth.
Fear gushed through her veins in that instant. No, this wasn't how things were supposed to go. The assassin was supposed to be in Polis, not here in Mount Weather. Gina's mind and heart raced. That was when the first stab of pain wrenched through her body. She was being stabbed. Over and over again. She screamed against the hand clamped over her mouth. No one could hear her. She was alone.
The stabbing stopped, so did her screams. Gina could feel the life draining from her body as she dropped to the floor. But she wasn't dead yet. There was a fire in her eyes as she watched the Grounder open the panel on the desk, watched as she lay sprawled on the floor, pain seizing every nerve in her body. Gina coughed and sputtered, blood slipping over her lips.
And yet she did nothing but stay there on the floor, watching this Grounder, listening to Raven hail her on the radio over and over. It didn't end like this. It couldn't.
Her mind wandered to Bellamy, and she worried. If she died here today, would he be alright? Would he let the guilt consume him? Would he miss her?
Tears fell from her eyes as she tried to stop herself from crying out in pain and fear. She was still alive, though. She could still do something. The fight hadn't been knocked out of her just yet, even if she could feel herself dying with each drop of blood that left her body.
Forcing herself to move, Gina knew it was a death sentence, but she had to do something. She dragged herself over the floor, around the desk. Propping herself up, she looked at the panel. Self-destruct Initiated.
"Raven, we got a problem. A Grounder set off the self-destruct sequence. He has the codes on his arm. You have to get them."
Only the code could stop the sequence now. With the radio in her hand, she waited, she hoped. Bellamy had fallen for the Ice Nation's trap, but maybe, just maybe, they were good enough to stop this.
More and more blood was spilling from between her lips as she grasped the desk, begging it to support her, to hold her up. She believed in Raven, one of her closest friends. Raven would get the codes, they would stop the self-destruct. Everything would be okay.
Raven's voice reached Gina's ears over the radio, "How much time, Gina?"
"Forty-five seconds, Raven." She tried to keep the pain, the death out of her voice as she spoke. Even if they managed to stop the self-destruct, Gina felt pretty certain she wouldn't survive this.
Gina watched as the time ticked away, waiting for Raven to radio with the codes, but everything was growing so dim. Darkness was creeping in, and Gina knew she would die before she could save the lives of everyone left in Mount Weather. I'm sorry, Raven... I wanted to be there for you.
Tears came unwilled as Gina slumped over the desk, her blood everywhere. As the darkness consumed her mind, as she sat there dying, her last thought was with Bellamy: Bell, I'm so sorry. I couldn't save them. I couldn't be a hero. The light of the countdown reflected in her unseeing eyes as it ticked down to the death of all the innocents still inside Mount Weather.
Tuesday, October 04, 2016
Character Development - Betria Lyra Carrow (AU Post-Potter)
- by Jessalyn Blodget
We all adore Quidditch, but few of us in the magical world ever get the chance to really play competitively. I got the opportunity to interview Puddlemere United's newest chaser, Betria Carrow. Read everything from her childhood, to Hogwarts, to her career, and even her lovelife! Betria gushed on all the details of her life, and eve let me in on a few secrets!
The Woman Behind The Career
Jessalyn: Wow, hi! It's really cool to actually meet you! Is Betria alright?
Betria: Hey. Bertia's fine. Betty, Bet, and Bee work, too. I don't really care what you call me, really.
J: Cool, well, thanks for agreeing to the interview! Do you mind if I ask about your early childhood? We know you have a brother and a sister. What was it like growing up with them?
B: First of all, I have two sisters. (She sighed deeply and kind of rolled her eyes.) There's Del, who you already know about, and there's Cali. She's the baby. Poor girl. I'm sure you've had to have dug something up about her? No? I don't believe you, really, but I guess my mother did pretty well at hiding the information she didn't want getting out. Well, Cali is, y'see, a squib. My parents were too *****ing embarrased by having a squib daughter that they gave her up. Can you believe that? Giving up your own child? I mean, I was still a kid, but that when kind of when I started to grow apart from my family. I'm four years older than her, but she was way more fun to play with than Del. Anyway, Del and Aries are just kind of what you'd expect from a typical pureblood home, I guess. I haven't seen either of them in a while, though. Del's a bit cray, but she's my sister and I love her, y'know? I love Aries, too. Family is important, even when they're crazy.
Sorry if that got a little...deep for your article. I just want people to know that Cali exists and she's my baby sister, and I love her.
J: It's fine! Really! We're all so excited to learn more about you! Could you maybe tell us a little more about what it's like having a squib for a sister?
B: It's just like having anyone else for a sister. Except she's looked down on by most of the magical community for things she can't even control. And I never got to see her around Hogwarts, which was pretty much ****. All these other older siblings get the chance to guide their little siblings through how everything works, embarrass them in front of their friends... and I just got shafted. (She sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose.) Sorry, I just get really heated up about the way Cali's been treated sometimes - especially by the one's who were supposed to be there for her always.
J: Don't worry about it. It's really nice to see that you care about her so much. Where is she now?
B: I don't really know what she's doing right now. I haven't had the time to write her an actual owl in so long. I'm a ****** **** sister, I am. But I'm sure she's safe. The family that took her in? They love her to bits, and I love them for it. I don't know if they get that I'm so appreciative of them.
J: I see. Um, well, what can you tell us about your life at Hogwarts?
B: I don't think my time at Hogwarts was really any different than anyone else's. I joined the Quidditch team in my second year - thank Merlin I made the try-outs! And, well, Quidditch was pretty much everything to me from that point on. I did my homework as quickly and at as bare minimum requirements as possible just so I could practice more for the Quidditch games. A few of my friends said they thought I should have been in Hufflepuff instead of Slytherin. I don't know if they're right or not, but it doesn't really matter. It's just a silly label, anyway.
I did spend some time with my cousin. He had a lot of organizations going. Raising awareness about muggleborns or something. I was still a little set in the ways of my parents at the time, but I also didn't really care about purity. Either way, I was proud of my cousin. He did something most of us are afraid to do. I went to some of the meetings and such, but I generally stayed quiet there. No one really wants a pureblood to ruin a meeting like that. They all just kind of give you a disgusted look. I guess that's kind of how muggleborns felt before, huh?
J: Did you always know you wanted to be a professional Quidditch player?
B: Yes and no. My father got Aries this little kid broom. Y'know the type? The one's that barely hover off the ground? Yea, well, I took it. I liked it way more than he ever did, but I don't think my father wanted one of his daughters playing any sport, y'know? Me and him, we don't really get on very well. But I've always loved Quidditch. More so than Ari and Del, that's for sure. I ended up joining this silly like... little league in our town. Bunch of kids - y'know like aged seven to ten or so - just playing Quidditch as best we could with fake brooms. I knew I'd have to try-out for Quidditch as soon as possible when I got to Hogwarts.
It wasn't until fifth year, though, that I seriously considered it as a career, rather than just a hobby. With the OWL's coming up, I had to think about my future and all that. So I spoke with my head of house and we sort of decided that I should just throw myself at Quidditch. And that's what I did. I got decent OWL grades, mind you. Not that they really matter now, though. Anyways, I was put on the Puddlemere Reserve Team when I got out of Hogwarts. Er, well, I accepted the offer. I'd gotten a couple of others, but I wasn't looking to move away, really. So I took Puddlemere's offer. I played a few matches here and there with the team, and last year, when one of the chasers retired, I was the first choice. It's been incredible. Kind of like a dream, y'know?
J: So what are some of your hobbies outside of Quidditch?
B: Well, believe it or not, I've always been a huge fan of knitting. I learned how to knit without magic, even! I still mostly knit with magic, but it's fun to do without on occasion. I actually...I knit this horrid sweater for Ari for Christmas last year. Oh, it was HIDEOUS. Watching his face when he opened it? Priceless.
On occasion, I'll try my hand at baking. Usually results in some explosions, but it's all in good fun. Oh, one other thing I really enjoy? Muggle television. It's so incredible the things they come up with without magic.
The Lovelife of a Quidditch Star
J: I'm dying to know: is there a special someone waiting at home for you every night?
B: Sorry to disappoint, but no, there's no one.
J: You sound a little down. Was there someone until recently?
B: (She sighs, bites her lip, and looks off into the distance.) There was this one guy, but it's been years now. He's probably forgotten about me at this point. Anyways, we were actually engaged, me and him. He was just this...perfect, Scottish man. (There's a dreamy look in her eyes.) We had this, er, big sort of fight about three years ago now. It was so stupid - I was so stupid. But what's done is done.
J: I'm sorry to hear that. I'm sure he hasn't forgotten, espeically with your name and face all over the news now! Are you looking forward to your uniting then?
B: I'm rather not, actually. I believe I've already found THE ONE, or however you'd want to call it. He's gone, though, so I guess that'll be... something. I feel bad for the poor soul that has to end up with me.
J: And why's that?
B: Because I've got a touch exterior, and not just anyone can get past that. I'm a pretty judgemental person - or I can be. Not to mention I often seem like I just don't give a ****. It gets on people's nerves. That's how it's always been. That's why all my relationships at Hogwarts ended, too.
J: Oh? How many boyfriends did you have at Hogwarts?
B: Well, it was just the three. All of 'em in the last few years, too. Two in fifth, and one in sixth and into seventh. Met my Scotsman after Hogwarts. But it doesn't matter really. I'm either going to find my Scotsman and make it all up to him before my uniting, or I'll end up with some rando and be forced into that.
J: In the meantime, are you dating at all?
B: Believe it or not, no one's asked me on a date in years! I wouldn't be opposed, though. I guess I'd rather find someont to spend my life with on my own than through the uniting - not that I'm against the law or anything like that, I suppose. I just feel like I'd like to choose my life partner.
But, er, yea. I'm generally free on Tuesday and Wednesday evenings. And I can usually swing a Friday and a Saturday here or there. But it's all going to revolve around the practice schedule and matches.
The Dream Job
J: So what is a typical day like for a professional Quidditch player?
B: Well, on a typical practice day, we're up at 'bout five in the morning? Maybe earlier? Eat a big breakfast - eggs, bacon, fried mushrooms, toast with butter or jam, baked beans, sausages... y'know, just the typical full breakfast. Let that settle for just a bit, then we get started. We start with typical stretches on the field, get our bodies warmed up and all that. Then we pick up the brooms and practice formations, strategies, and that sort of thing. We take a break for lunch, and then it's right back at it. Usually with a skirmish in the last afternoon. The whole reserve team practices with us, of course, so there's plenty of us for a skirmish. It's really great fun.
J: And you do that every day?
B: (She shrugs as if it's nothing.) Most days, at least. We're professional athletes, we've got to stay at the top of our game if we want to be the best. Besides, some of use are trying to get picked for England's national team for the next Quidditch World Cup tournament.
J: What do you do differently on the day of a match?
B: We don't typically get up as early on match days. Want to make sure we're rested for the game, after all. Run through some stretches, some formations. It's like a mini-practice before the game starts. Then we play the match, and we generally have off the next day.
J: So, what is it like being famous? Are you recognized everywhere you go?
B: It's weird, actually. Went through Hogwarts just being some girl on the Slytherin Quidditch team, right? And now I've got all these people I went to Hogwarts with acting like we've always been close. I don't go out too much anymore because of it. Sometimes it's nice though. Y'know? If you're feeling rotten, just go outside and all these people tell you how amazing you are, and you love them for it.
J: What will you do once you're done with Quidditch?
B: I haven't really thought about it much. I suppose I could go into Quidditch journalism. Or perhaps the ministry would take me for the Department of Magical Games and Sports. Or, who knows? Maybe I'll just go be a shopkeep at Quality Quidditch Supplies.
J: That's all the questions we have for you today. Thank you so much for the interview, Betria! It was great getting to know you.
B: It was cool. I can't imagine people reading about me, though. It's weird. Thanks for your time and all that.
Chatting with Betria Carrow was an incredible opportunity. It almost made me wish I'd played more Quidditch when I was younger! Betria was great to work with, despite her sort of lethargic demeanor, and was actually a lot of fun. When it comes right down to it, she's just like you and me, but here are some things in particular we spotted about her and wanted to share with all of you:
* She is always striving to succeed, but she's humble about her success and her ride to the top.
* There is always confidence behind her kind smile.
* She knows how & isn't afraid to look out for herself, but she's incredibly loyal to those she loves.
* She's super nice! Until someone crosses her (Betria, if you're reading this, Jerry is really sorry, and he didn't mean it!)
* As a Syltherin, she can be ruthlessly cunning, but she's got a conscience that could rival Harry Potter's!
* She likes to keep to herself and isn't hugely into socializing.
* There is always confidence behind her kind smile.
* She knows how & isn't afraid to look out for herself, but she's incredibly loyal to those she loves.
* She's super nice! Until someone crosses her (Betria, if you're reading this, Jerry is really sorry, and he didn't mean it!)
* As a Syltherin, she can be ruthlessly cunning, but she's got a conscience that could rival Harry Potter's!
* She likes to keep to herself and isn't hugely into socializing.
We were given the chance to get some incredible picture of Betria practicing with the rest of Puddlemere United. Take a look at the next page for the photos!
Wednesday, July 13, 2016
Writing Doodle 034 - Once Upon A Time
Once upon a time, there lived a princess. She grew up, dreaming of true love, with hope in her heart. One day, she met a prince, and she thought that she must have been in love. He was so confident and wonderful! He took her away, and locked her in a tower.
For a time, the princess was happy in her tower. She felt safe and protected. Oh how the prince must love me, she thought, for he cannot bear to see me come to harm, and so he keeps me locked away safe in this tower! And she was happy.
A year passed, and the prince threatened to leave the princess, throw her from the tower. The princess was terrified, and horribly saddened. She spent more and more time outside the tower, and just as she was getting used to being out in the world alone again, the prince begged her to come back. Thinking it was destiny that had pulled her back to the prince, she agreed, and back to the tower she went, locked away from the world, and safe.
Another year rolled by. The princess, and the tower, were moved to a new kingdom with the prince. It was beautiful there, and the princess began to long for the things outside her tower. Yet the prince kept her there. Thinking the prince knew best, and that he was only trying to protect her, she stayed.
It was the middle of the princess's third year locked in the tower when she got a message that her father had gone missing. The princess's mother was devastated, as was her younger sister. But the princess could do nothing to help her grieving family. The kingdom the prince had moved her to needed her so badly, that were she to leave, even just for a day, the kingdom would crumble, and the princess would be held responsible. She wrote to her mother and sister constantly, reassuring them that they were better off, that the wounds would heal in time. Oh, how she longed to leave the tower.
The princess felt as though she were wilting, locked away. The prince had broken her. He had made her believe that she was nothing with him and the protection his tower provided her. Then one day, the prince brought another princess to the tower. The princess was surprised and hurt. The prince did not hide the second princess, but the princess wondered why she wasn't enough for him. It wasn't until that moment, when he'd made her truly feel worthless, that she realized she was better than this.
She knew she had to escape from the tower.
Leaning from her window, she met a young handsome man. He claimed he was a knight, and he made the princess smile. She had not smiled for quite some time. He was going to help her from the tower, he had promised. She waited for him. Days passed, weeks passed, and soon it had been over a month, and the princess had not heard from her knight. He had abandoned her. She wept for herself then, thinking the worst of herself, yet knowing she did not belong in this tower.
Another month went by. The prince had taken the second princess away, but she had written the princess, claiming to have escaped. The princess took a deep breath and lept from the tower, leaving behind only a note for the prince, telling him she no longer loved him, and wasn't sure she really ever did.
It was a surprise to the princess to find that the leap from the tower was nothing to be afraid of. She landed in a warm pool and swam for some time before leaving the water behind. A smile had come to rest on her lips as she walked freely through the kingdom, making friends. One night, as she was spending time with her new friends, the prince came to her, begging her to speak with him. Being the kind-hearted soul she was, she obliged. The prince tried to convince her she had made a mistake, that in a few months time, she should return to the tower - just to be sure. Seeing no harm in the deal, the princess agreed and sent the weeping prince on his way.
Months passed. The princess was finally beginning to feel good about herself. She had even gone dancing with a man from the village. But, as she promised, she returned to the tower. The prince had paintings of other princesses hanging on the walls. He told her that he was over her. Really, he was just trying to make her jealous. The princess did not fall for the prince's trap, however. The next morning, she left, happier than even the day before.
The man from the village brought her a rose, asked her with a hand-written note to be his. The princess, feeling nothing for his kind man, turned him down. She had decided she wasn't ready to belong to someone again. But she didn't see the harm in sharing a dinner here and there with a man who fancied her.
That was when she met the knighted prince. She had dinner with him just once, but everything felt different. It was just so wonderful, and she felt like she could have spent all night just talking about nothing, if he had only stayed. None of the others gave her the same feeling. In fact, they were all rather dull in comparison.
The princess followed the knighted prince as he smiled down at her from atop his horse. He was everything she had ever dreamed of. They began seeing one another in secret. It was nearly three months before they announced their engagement to the kingdom, but in those three months, the princess had fallen quite deeply in love with the knighted prince. She imagined what their wedding would be like, and hoped it would come quickly.
The princess was happy with the knighted prince. He was kind to her, and so supportive. She began to feel like she was valuable, and was able to be happy. Really, truly happy. It didn't matter if he were by her side at all times, as long as he loved her, she knew she would be the happiest princess in the world. Her confidence was building, and she even went out and did things she never thought she'd be able to. She had even gotten a position in a small kingdom supporting the ruler, and all this while her knighted prince was away for three long months.
It felt like it had been forever when he returned. The princess was so glad to see him, and she asked him to stay the night with her. They talked quite a bit, and the princess asked if he would be returning to the land of snow - where he had been for those three months - at the end of the next harvest. The knighted prince explained that he hoped he would be asked to return, and permanently, but he did not want the princess to follow him. The princess felt her heart shatter. The confidence she had been building up, the happiness she'd learned to cultivate in herself withered. She couldn't understand why he would not want her to go with him, but he refused to talk more on it.
Months more passed, and the princess could only feel herself growing sadder and sadder. She missed the person she had been when she'd met her knighted prince - so warm, kind, and optimistic! But she didn't know how to fix herself. The knighted prince spent less and less time with her, and she began to wonder if he loved her at all.
Finally, the harvest came to an end. The knighted prince had been called to a hearing in the land of snow, and the princess knew he was going to leave her behind. She sobbed, and he held her. Finally, she turned to him, asking him why? Why didn't he want her to go with him? That was when he'd made it very clear that he did not love her. He never had.
The princess felt her heart shatter then. Of all the terrible luck she could have had, she had never expected this. She wondered why he had spent so long courting her if he did not love her. He claimed it was hope - hope that he would love her as deeply as she loved him. And yet, he did not. The princess felt her optimism draining away, and wondered if she were unlovable. If her knighted prince could not love her, then who could?
A month passed, and the knighted prince spent a lot of time with the princess. She knew it was meant as a parting, but then the knighted prince heard from the land of snow that they had found someone better suited to the position. He was devastated, and the princess did all she could to console him despite how miserable she felt herself.
The days dragged into weeks then, and still the knighted prince did not break off his ties with the princess. It was beginning to be very painful for her, watching him from afar, watching him avoid spending time with her. All she really wanted was one last touch, one last kiss, one last tender moment, but he would not oblige her.
Finally, she asked him to dinner, and it was there that she told him he did not need to worry about her any longer; that she was leaving. She said she hoped he'd be happier this way, and perhaps they could still be friends.
With a broken and heavy heart, the princess returned to her home, alone. There, she sat for days, crying and screaming, wishing for nothing but the knighted prince's love, and knowing it would never be hers.
For a time, the princess was happy in her tower. She felt safe and protected. Oh how the prince must love me, she thought, for he cannot bear to see me come to harm, and so he keeps me locked away safe in this tower! And she was happy.
A year passed, and the prince threatened to leave the princess, throw her from the tower. The princess was terrified, and horribly saddened. She spent more and more time outside the tower, and just as she was getting used to being out in the world alone again, the prince begged her to come back. Thinking it was destiny that had pulled her back to the prince, she agreed, and back to the tower she went, locked away from the world, and safe.
Another year rolled by. The princess, and the tower, were moved to a new kingdom with the prince. It was beautiful there, and the princess began to long for the things outside her tower. Yet the prince kept her there. Thinking the prince knew best, and that he was only trying to protect her, she stayed.
It was the middle of the princess's third year locked in the tower when she got a message that her father had gone missing. The princess's mother was devastated, as was her younger sister. But the princess could do nothing to help her grieving family. The kingdom the prince had moved her to needed her so badly, that were she to leave, even just for a day, the kingdom would crumble, and the princess would be held responsible. She wrote to her mother and sister constantly, reassuring them that they were better off, that the wounds would heal in time. Oh, how she longed to leave the tower.
The princess felt as though she were wilting, locked away. The prince had broken her. He had made her believe that she was nothing with him and the protection his tower provided her. Then one day, the prince brought another princess to the tower. The princess was surprised and hurt. The prince did not hide the second princess, but the princess wondered why she wasn't enough for him. It wasn't until that moment, when he'd made her truly feel worthless, that she realized she was better than this.
She knew she had to escape from the tower.
Leaning from her window, she met a young handsome man. He claimed he was a knight, and he made the princess smile. She had not smiled for quite some time. He was going to help her from the tower, he had promised. She waited for him. Days passed, weeks passed, and soon it had been over a month, and the princess had not heard from her knight. He had abandoned her. She wept for herself then, thinking the worst of herself, yet knowing she did not belong in this tower.
Another month went by. The prince had taken the second princess away, but she had written the princess, claiming to have escaped. The princess took a deep breath and lept from the tower, leaving behind only a note for the prince, telling him she no longer loved him, and wasn't sure she really ever did.
It was a surprise to the princess to find that the leap from the tower was nothing to be afraid of. She landed in a warm pool and swam for some time before leaving the water behind. A smile had come to rest on her lips as she walked freely through the kingdom, making friends. One night, as she was spending time with her new friends, the prince came to her, begging her to speak with him. Being the kind-hearted soul she was, she obliged. The prince tried to convince her she had made a mistake, that in a few months time, she should return to the tower - just to be sure. Seeing no harm in the deal, the princess agreed and sent the weeping prince on his way.
Months passed. The princess was finally beginning to feel good about herself. She had even gone dancing with a man from the village. But, as she promised, she returned to the tower. The prince had paintings of other princesses hanging on the walls. He told her that he was over her. Really, he was just trying to make her jealous. The princess did not fall for the prince's trap, however. The next morning, she left, happier than even the day before.
The man from the village brought her a rose, asked her with a hand-written note to be his. The princess, feeling nothing for his kind man, turned him down. She had decided she wasn't ready to belong to someone again. But she didn't see the harm in sharing a dinner here and there with a man who fancied her.
That was when she met the knighted prince. She had dinner with him just once, but everything felt different. It was just so wonderful, and she felt like she could have spent all night just talking about nothing, if he had only stayed. None of the others gave her the same feeling. In fact, they were all rather dull in comparison.
The princess followed the knighted prince as he smiled down at her from atop his horse. He was everything she had ever dreamed of. They began seeing one another in secret. It was nearly three months before they announced their engagement to the kingdom, but in those three months, the princess had fallen quite deeply in love with the knighted prince. She imagined what their wedding would be like, and hoped it would come quickly.
The princess was happy with the knighted prince. He was kind to her, and so supportive. She began to feel like she was valuable, and was able to be happy. Really, truly happy. It didn't matter if he were by her side at all times, as long as he loved her, she knew she would be the happiest princess in the world. Her confidence was building, and she even went out and did things she never thought she'd be able to. She had even gotten a position in a small kingdom supporting the ruler, and all this while her knighted prince was away for three long months.
It felt like it had been forever when he returned. The princess was so glad to see him, and she asked him to stay the night with her. They talked quite a bit, and the princess asked if he would be returning to the land of snow - where he had been for those three months - at the end of the next harvest. The knighted prince explained that he hoped he would be asked to return, and permanently, but he did not want the princess to follow him. The princess felt her heart shatter. The confidence she had been building up, the happiness she'd learned to cultivate in herself withered. She couldn't understand why he would not want her to go with him, but he refused to talk more on it.
Months more passed, and the princess could only feel herself growing sadder and sadder. She missed the person she had been when she'd met her knighted prince - so warm, kind, and optimistic! But she didn't know how to fix herself. The knighted prince spent less and less time with her, and she began to wonder if he loved her at all.
Finally, the harvest came to an end. The knighted prince had been called to a hearing in the land of snow, and the princess knew he was going to leave her behind. She sobbed, and he held her. Finally, she turned to him, asking him why? Why didn't he want her to go with him? That was when he'd made it very clear that he did not love her. He never had.
The princess felt her heart shatter then. Of all the terrible luck she could have had, she had never expected this. She wondered why he had spent so long courting her if he did not love her. He claimed it was hope - hope that he would love her as deeply as she loved him. And yet, he did not. The princess felt her optimism draining away, and wondered if she were unlovable. If her knighted prince could not love her, then who could?
A month passed, and the knighted prince spent a lot of time with the princess. She knew it was meant as a parting, but then the knighted prince heard from the land of snow that they had found someone better suited to the position. He was devastated, and the princess did all she could to console him despite how miserable she felt herself.
The days dragged into weeks then, and still the knighted prince did not break off his ties with the princess. It was beginning to be very painful for her, watching him from afar, watching him avoid spending time with her. All she really wanted was one last touch, one last kiss, one last tender moment, but he would not oblige her.
Finally, she asked him to dinner, and it was there that she told him he did not need to worry about her any longer; that she was leaving. She said she hoped he'd be happier this way, and perhaps they could still be friends.
With a broken and heavy heart, the princess returned to her home, alone. There, she sat for days, crying and screaming, wishing for nothing but the knighted prince's love, and knowing it would never be hers.
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